My Personal Approach to Support

Are you coming to counselling thinking there is something wrong with you, or that you are broken and need fixing? Well, maybe there isn’t anything wrong with you, maybe it really is other people that are the problem. There might be some skills you can learn to help you cope, but sometimes it’s about learning our strengths and how to live from them.

Being told how to behave and act in childhood means we lose our true self. We learn to seek the approval of others, rather than what works for us. So as an adult we struggle to know our real self and what works for us. Has anyone ever really taken the time to help you know yourself and see what’s right about you, rather than what’s ‘wrong’? I will.

Although my working career has been in business and self-employment, I realise that I am naturally a teacher, guide and mentor – hence why I am now a counsellor, therapist and coach.

But I’m also deeply compassionate and empathic. Coming to therapy can feel scary and it can take a courageous leap to come forward and seek help. I know this, as I’ve been there too.

So I won’t ask you to reveal anything you don’t want to, or discuss things you aren’t comfortable with. Person-centred counselling is done at your pace, discussing only the things you feel ready to discuss, when you’re ready. It’s about listening and helping you develop understanding, not telling you what to do or making you suffer more than you already are. We can take things slowly and gently, if that’s what works for you.  

Using Therapy

I believe that all forms of therapy and counselling need personal awareness. Without seeing, observing and understanding our thoughts, feelings and actions, therapy is unlikely to be successful.

Many therapies aim to eliminate or reduce something perceived as a ‘problem’. Nothing wrong with that of course, but sometimes we actually want to look at how to make our lives happier, more joyful or peaceful and lighter. We want to make our hearts and souls sing. So I like to help with both – the challenges that need resolving and building a life that works for you.

Our life circumstances are made of two elements:

• how we respond to the actions of others or the things life presents to us,
• the conscious choices we make and actions we take.

We are experiencing the consequences of decisions and responses made 5, 10 or even 30 years ago. Similarly, how our life looks in a few years will be based on the responses and decisions we make now. This is where mindfulness and understanding our thinking patterns helps as we can get a better grasp of what we do and the consequences of it.

Seeing the world in different ways and thinking flexibly means we can navigate the world better. We can make decisions that help bring more happiness, less unhappiness and ultimately more satisfaction and peace. If we do less of what makes us unhappy and more of what does make us happy there can be only one possible outcome; a more peaceful, happier life.